English story- Land Beyond the woods

HI all, this is my latest english story, Thank you to all that helped by editing and proofreading

Land Beyond the Woods

By Cassie *****
Lucy looked from the picture in her frozen hands to the bland landscape outside. There was no reason to suggest that this was the same location. The picture portrayed a happy, bright environment while the other suggested the complete opposite. The car grinded to a halt, sending miscellaneous objects flying, the Thatcher family evacuated the car, and ran through the pouring rain into their new house. It was dark, cold and dimly lit.
“This really wasn’t what I expected and wanted,” exclaimed Lucy, who was obviously displeased with the house and the weather.
“Can I sleep with you tonight, Luce?” asked Maxi, exhausted by the travel.
“Yep, as soon as mum’s got the bed ready” replied Lucy, who could not be bothered to argue. Finally, after what seemed like an hour, Lucy and Maxi fell asleep in a warm comfy bed.
Saturday came and went without a dilemma or complaint. However on Sunday, Lucy, who was bored, decided there must be a tree house in the woods, and decided to venture out to find one.
“Luce, can I please come with you?” pleaded Maxi, who was just as bored as her older sister.
“I guess so, seeing as they haven’t unpacked your dolls,” replied Lucy. With that she stood up, walked outside and threw open the gates to reveal, magnificent tall pine trees, and the pines, leaves and wood on the ground, all lit brightly by the morning sunlight.
They walked through the dense woods. Finally, after an hour they reached a deserted clearing, bar an old ramshackle, rundown hut on the opposite side. Besides being the only object in the clearing, the other eccentric thing was that it was covered in life sized beady-eyed eagles, watching their every move. As they were examining the house it started to pour with rain, and the sound of distant thunder could be heard.
“Quickly, inside, out of the rain” requested Lucy, pulling Maxi inside.
“NO, it’s yucky, your not making me, take me home!” yelled Maxi, her voice raised.
“Fine then” replied Lucy walking into the house.
“Oh, oh alright” mumbled Maxi, as they stepped into the mouldy dark room, together.
They searched through the rubble and mess, trying to find somewhere to sit, and wait.
“Hey, look at this, I got something, you don’t have!” sang Maxi, gleefully
“Gimme that” yelled Lucy. As they tugged on the necklace, a bubble appeared around them. Before they had time to scream in surprise, the bubble burst, with them inside it. The necklace dropped with a clang on the hard wooden floor.
There was a swirl of light, filled with exuberant colours, then a draught of cold wind. Neither Lucy nor Maxi knew what was happening. They landed in a clump, on a cold, deserted, moonlit hill. Lucy looked around, trying to remember if she had been there before. After a couple of minutes she gave up and looked at her sister to find her shell-shocked.
“C’mon lets head down the main road. Hopefully, we will find help,” whispered Lucy as they made their way down the flourishing hill.
“Eek! All the houses are nests!” exclaimed Maxi, as the road came into view. Sure enough the houses were nests. They now walked more closely together on the grotty, uneven, gravel road, not knowing what to do or say. Suddenly Lucy tripped on the uneven gravel, her scream and fall echoing in the deserted town. Bang! Eagles had surrounded them, looking rather annoyed. As Lucy and Maxi huddled together, they both heard the eagles chant, in very different voices, and in a language, neither of them knew, but understood
“Come; come, dwellers of space and time, ha ha! We are ahead of you! No, no escaping, three choices we give you! Wait and see!”
They chanted and chanted until Lucy and Maxi were dragged into a hall, to meet Maratakah head of the eagles.
“I will give you three choices,” he said menacingly.
“Death, slavery or life as an eagle” he continued.
“What ever you choose,” pointing at Lucy, “she must choose too.
“Choose now.”
“I choose to become an eagle,” replied Lucy
“Very well,” replied Maratakah. As he did so he clapped his hand and the last thing Lucy could remember thinking was: “I am not an eagle. I’m dead. They tricked me!”